Cultural relativism has never been a very effective approach to addressing any issue including feminism or women's rights in this instance. It decontextualises and homogenises this thing we call 'culture'. Responding to neocolonialism and problematic developmental paradigms does not need to be done through a retreat to a glorious African past that creates a false opposition between US and THEM.

I know that women's rights activists, organisations and researchers across the continent recognise women's agency and not their victimhood and centralise this in their approaches. It is this agency that has led to the tremendous shifts in women's realities including those that you cite with your article. Whether you attribute this to ‘cultural' support mechanisms or power within is up for debate.
Homogenising all women and all women's rights agencies and approaches into ‘anti-culture', 'lost Africans’, ‘wayward outlaw women’ 'indisciplined activists’ is highly problematic for the very reasons you critique approaches that turn all African women into ‘hapless and voiceless’.

The task of transformation demands an engagement with sites of power and while the notion of 'culture' requires a nuanced analysis it still remains one of those sites that must be approached critically. One of the challenges in addressing your valid concerns about the proliferation of international development NGO's through a ‘anti-culture’ and 'western’ paradigm is the fact that in one full sweep you dismiss hundreds of women's groups and full-fledged movements dotted across this continent working with, for and established by women.

The same way the ‘western’ and ‘culture’ binary must be interrogated is the same way the ‘grassroots’ and ‘urban’ woman division must be re-examined. It is false and belies both the importance of contexts and the intersecting questions of class and ethnicity.

You may want to acquaint yourself with the work of organisations such as GROOTS, AWDF, UAF-AFRICA, POWA, Saartjie Baartman Centre, Isis WICCE, amongst many others that you will not find on the internet. This will allow for a more sophisticated engagement with some of the very important issues you are raising.